Not just that the thing is done, the music is played, the food is made, the journey taken, but that it is done by or for you, that you are the one for whom or in whom it is accomplished. Doesn't every form of desire come down to this? To have been present at the event, adsum, to be in addition, being and more than being; assimilating the event in your own being, owning it. This peculiar existential discomfort of airports. Being and having merge into each other. How could jealousy arise without this; it is not enough that it happens in a completely indifferent manner, but that it be in your appropriation. All of this all the time; the medium in which life takes place - the mediator requiring no explanation, no reflection. There may be states of consciousness more or less free of desires, but how could there be consciousness without desire, the desire inseparable from being present? The desireless state being only a more sophisticated object of desire.