The experiencing is all that there is, and yet you identify as something other than it, as that for which the experiencing is contingent, the outcome of a set of choices, largely arbitrary, and which could have been different. Experience never quite matches your appetite for experience. Do you experience that gap, or only the idea of it? It seems frightening to be nothing but the experiencing, as if you have let go of all moorings, but that fear is only a certain modulation of experience.